One of my favourite things to do is take myself out on a solo date. Don’t get me wrong, eating out at a restaurant with friends is one of life’s great pleasures. But dining out solo is self care for me.

There’s something meditative about it. Ordering what I feel like, taking my time, and taking in the buzz of the room, whilst getting lost in my own thoughts.

Life often gets too busy and I don’t make time for it as often as I’d like, but when I do always leave smiling.

And then there is the plot twist. On the last two occasions I have taken myself out on a solo date, I’ve somehow ended up with a date.

One on Challis Avenue, a leafy street in Potts Point and home to Fratelli Paradiso. I took a seat alone, a glass of Nebbiolo in one hand, twirling spaghetti agli scampi in the other, and finished with a generous spoonful of their tiramisu. I had a book open and a note book beside me. No agenda, just food, words in my books, buzz of the restaurant and my own thoughts.

Then quietly, a piece of paper was slide across to me. An invitation for a drink. I responded every so confidently, with my pen: text me ……. xx.

The other was in Paris, at a buzzing Parisian neighbourhood bistro called Chez Janou, the kind of place that makes you feel alive before you walk in. I found myself there the following evening, asking for a seat at the bar and letting the night unfold: good, mussels and the best chocolate mousse of my life. And a guy across the bar. Long story short, we made a promise to meet back on the same evening the following year, saved neatly in both of our calendars.

It made me think about the confidence and how powerful it can be. There’s something appealing about seeing someone sit alone at a restaurant or bar with a book and a glass of wine, and when you noticed it, you quietly want to know more.

When I am out with my girlfriends, we’re usually loud, laughing, deep in conversation or buried in a DM, which doesn’t always make you approachable. And that’s before you factor in the current dating landscape, how easy it is so swipe right, and how disposable everything will feel.

Maybe solo dining is about more than food. Maybe it’s about making space for yourself, and sometimes the unexpected.